Saturday, May 11, 2013

Holy Rainstorm, Batman

The rain has been super heavy this week.  Thunderstorms have rolled into the area last night with thunder so loud that it shook the house.  It is crazy and kind of awesome.  The rain comes down in sheets as though someone has just overturned a bucket on the world.
The unfortunate side effect is that family walks are on hold all week.  (My working at night hasn't helped, either, though.)   Bard's momentum has ground to a halt and I feel his inertia affecting us both.  I need rainy days activities for him.  I'm happy to do an exercise DVD (even on nice days) but him, not so much.
I worry that I'm pushing too much on him.  He has these goals but doesn't seem too enthusiastic.  I feel like he's afraid of failure.  It's hard to draw him into that conversation.
My two favorite people
I read a magazine article once in high school.  Less an article and more a fashion photo spread.  I was getting front highlights (like Rogue from X-Men; I carried that look for years.  Embarrassing.) and the only magazine within arm's reach was Vogue or something like that.  Anyway, this "article" was called "Homme Improvement."  The phrase stuck with me.  The meaning for the article was something like dress your man like a boho hipster (or whatever was cool at the time).  For me, it struck something of a sour note.  I was dating someone at the time who could definitely use some "Homme Improvement" but it seemed dishonest at a level.  Aren't you supposed to like people for who they are?  Don't we pity women who try to change their man?
But I want to help Bard with change that he wants.  Something about this time feels different to me.  Like I'm finally ready.  If I follow my plan, I'll be to my goal weight by the time Lala is two.  But I don't know if Bard is ready.
Grah!  I'm probably thinking too much.

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